in vino veritas

it takes some cold to know the sun

2008-06-26T12:59:42Z

In just two days, I learnt that what really brings me down isn't being alone when I'm melancholy, but rather being alone when I have much joy to share. It's no use having the finest food on my plate if I were to dine alone. Makes me feel really hollow and lonely. And nothing can be quite celebratory if you're lonely.

I'm caught in one of my emotional crises again, those that come every once in a while, just like an economic recession. Dogged thoughts of me being an unwanted, unloved creature envelop me though I'm acutely aware that reality says otherwise. I picture little devils playing tug-of-war with my heartstrings till they rupture, making me bleed inside.

Leaves me vaguely suicidal and eager to intoxicate myself.

W(hole)hearted

2008-02-13T16:41:02Z

This is the reason why I do not feel I belong in Singapore. i mean, damn it, people need the government to promote romance. it's stupefying, it's embarrassing. first they're too busy to make love, now they're simply too busy to love. passive and pathetic; it's time to work on that passion, dudes.

***

Singapore govt plays Cupid for Valentine's Day

Worried that a low birth rate could threaten the country's very survival Singapore's government is playing Cupid, using Valentine's Day to promote romance and marriage.

In a city where many singles say they are too busy making money to make love, the government plans to step up its official "Romancing Singapore" campaign on Thursday, the traditional lovers' day, to encourage people to take up dating.

The campaign, launched in 2002 and managed commercially by the private sector since 2005, has lined up a series of events throughout February and on Valentine's Day itself to try to reverse the falling birthrate.

And a separate initiative sees the government directly funding efforts to promote romance.

In 2006 it launched the one-million-Singapore-dollar (704,000 US) Partner Connection Fund to support dating agencies that come up with what it called new "social interaction opportunities" for singles.

"A lot of countries, they let nature take its course but in Singapore because of our work and lifestyle, we don't have a lot of time," said Andrew Chow, a manager with Romancing Singapore.

"We are trying to educate the singles that dating is in fact a lifestyle. I think nowhere else in the world does things like Singapore."

Among the events Romancing Singapore has planned to give Cupid a helping hand is an evening date on the newly-opened Singapore Flyer, the world's tallest observation wheel at 42 storeys high.

The Valentine's Day event, billed as "Love In A Capsule," is organised by Romancing Singapore and Clique Wise, another social networking outfit.

From movie marathons, Friday night shopping sprees and treasure hunts, Romancing Singapore says it has tapped more than 5,000 singles to participate in previous events.

Love comes at a price, though -- a date on the Singapore Flyer costs 140 US dollars, which includes a gourmet dinner at a spa resort. All 24 slots have been booked, said Chow.

Violet Lim, co-founder of dating agency Lunch Actually, agreed Singapore's fast-paced lifestyle has made it hard for couples to connect.

"We play the role of an introducer," she said. "A lot of people who join us, they are not exactly people who can't find dates on their own. I would say it's more due to their schedules."

A subsidiary of Lunch Actually, Eteract.com, received funding from the government's Partner Connection Fund for its online dating platform.

The platform allows singles to get acquainted by chatting and even playing games in cyberspace, said Lim, adding the identities of participants have been verified.

The number of babies born per woman in Singapore fell to an historic low of 1.24 in 2004 and 2005, far below the rate of 2.1 needed for the population to replenish itself, the government has said.

This shortage prompted authorities to offer cash incentives for couples having more than two children, encourage foreigners to adopt citizenship, and ease up on previously taboo subjects like sex.

"We have managed to reverse the decline in births, but only barely," Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong said in a message on the eve of Lunar New Year earlier this month.

"Last year we only had 37,000 resident births, just 2,000 more than in 2004."

Lee said that ultimately the issue is not just about financial incentives but other factors including "social attitudes".

Singapore had a population of 4,588,600 last year but about one million of those were non-resident foreigners, official statistics show.

Perhaps among those numbers lies the partner Joyce Tia is seeking.

Tia, a group financial controller in her thirties, will join a dinner date organised by Ideas and Concepts dating agency on the eve of Valentine's Day.

"I am looking for a long-term relationship so having the dating agency to provide me the background of the person is good," said Tia.

(Source: http://news.sg.msn.com/regional/article.aspx?cp-documentid=1240093)

egredi @ 2007-12-28T00:41:00

2007-12-27T16:45:20Z

About Peter Bjorn and John's Young Folks being played on popular radio, I'm still in a state of denial. Alternative is going mainstream, how ironic.

egredi @ 2007-09-15T20:21:00

2007-09-15T12:34:56Z

An invariably depressing day. I sought and continue to seek numbness, through physical exertion, sleep and overworking. but you know it's no use when the gloominess comes creeping back to you after those momentary respites. Robbie William's Eternity brings tears to my eyes. I'm entertaining romantic, depressing thoughts. It can be scary indeed, discovering certain new things about yourself, but the scariest is in being uncertain about that discovery. I cannot articulate that which I do not know about yet.

[Exeunt]

"Sauna ah! You've been exercising and that's enough."

2007-08-27T15:51:02Z

For years, my mother has stood by this warped belief that as long as you perspire, calories-burning is at play. to her unwavering devotion to this notion I can testify, for it was first impressed upon my tender 9-year-old mind, and it was last conveyed 9 minutes ago to me (though i have, in my more mature years, many a time explained to her that the excretion of bodily fluids through the pores of your skin does not necessarily equate to being a step closer to achieving svelteness). This resurfaced verbalisation of the stubbornly held misconception was triggered off by my sleeping with the fan rather than the air-con switched on the past few weeks, which she thinks is the act of a teenage weight-obsessed daughter. i'm flabbergasted, perplexed, dumbfounded, stupefied, and pretty much everything else you can find under the "shocked" entry of a thesaurus. above all, i'm amused.

1. her argument contradicts outright her insistence on stocking up snacks in every nook and cranny of the kitchen because of me;
2. i'm not that sillily teenagey;
3. the weather's been cold enough and i just HATE freezing under the aircon (side note: i despise Singapore's Air-conditioned Nation title);
4. if she would let me enlighten her she would understand that if i were that motivated by anorexic behaviour, i WOULD let the glorious 18 degree Celsius iciness envelope me and happily shiver calories away through the night - your body expends more energy keeping you warm when your surroundings are cold, thus increasing metabolism.

sigh. Mum can be so adorable sometimes.

Cher Amour

2007-08-20T15:19:49Z

PageOne's security personnel chided us today for overt displays of affection. I love how we never do give a damn, and I love how it is Paris everywhere we are.

Look at you you're growing old so young.

2007-06-27T15:51:27Z

I wish you would wake me up while I sleepwalk, so I could kill you and get away with it.

Never thought the end would be so near.

2007-06-17T10:18:48Z

Because he's all worth it, and much more. Rock for good, Rock for Wayne.

(click for a beautiful song and all that you need to know)

This is not a love song

2007-06-12T14:02:58Z

We three, alcohol and beach chairs. Called the beach our own, swam under the stars, swam in each other's kisses.
With you, I remember how it smelt and felt. The nicotine in your breath intertwined with wisps of your cologne, an exhilarating concoction. In between waves you outlined my body with your manly palm, and we melted into each other and the night.

I lived my fantasy, only to have it better than imagined.

Because i get bored sometimes too.

2007-05-02T17:39:21Z

You Have a Choleric Temperament

You are a person of great enthusiasm - easily excited by many things. Unsatisfied by the ordinary, you are reaching for an epic, extraordinary life. You want the best. The best life. The best love. The best reputation.

You possess a sharp and keen intellect. Your mind is your primary weapon. Strong willed, nothing can keep you down. Your energy can break down any wall. You're an instantly passionate person - and this passion gives you an intoxicating power over others.

At your worst, you are a narcissist. Full of yourself and even proud of your faults. Stubborn and opinionated, you know what you think is right. End of discussion. A bit of a misanthrope, you often see others as weak, ignorant, and inferior.

What Temperament Are You?

JiaTao - www.fishytank.net says:

HAHAHA
JiaTao - www.fishytank.net says:
yes
JiaTao - www.fishytank.net says:
its like ultra accurate

egredi @ 2007-05-01T14:14:00

2007-05-01T06:14:55Z

Verdammt! Meine Kamera ist kaputt. ):

stormy LRT day

2007-04-23T02:36:38Z

ctrlALTdel

2007-04-22T10:50:58Z

Songs that make you dream of many faraway things; wrench your heart inexplicably; set ablaze that latent desire to abandon and take off;

I love.

Know Thy Neighbour (not)

2007-04-15T12:19:45Z

Better late than never.

2007-04-13T15:21:37Z

Don't get me wrong; I admire myself for being technologically illiterate. but this is really making me feel quite dumb cos AFTER THREE DARN YEARS OR MORE OH PLEASE DON'T LET IT BE MORE I JUST REALISED - I SHALL NOTE THE DATE AND TIME OF THIS GROUNDBREAKING MOMENT AND NEVER FORGET IT - THAT MY LAPTOP BATTERY MAY BE DETACHED. woohoorahrahyahbahdeedoodagahfeefalalaaaaaaahahahhahahhahahaaahahahaaahohomofo.

Ray, a drop of Golden Sun

2007-04-06T17:49:05Z

jie sheng was being all angsty over lunch over certain external interferences of his free will, so he no longer bothered about his image and spewed profanities while i - who coincidentally had been working on an essay on liberty - listened to his woes with considerable calm. we began a string of skipping routines during our after-lunch walk; he challenged me to skip my way out of business school (he doesn't know me well enough to know i'll gamely and retardedly accept it) and i challenged him to join me. he sniggered saying that while i'd look very natural doing it, others will just think him a freak. and since he was disgruntled he couldn't skip cos skipping is what happy people do. i said heck the world and you don't have to be happy to skip you can skip to make yourself happier so we skipped anyway. variations are as follows:

1) a demonstration of skipping while feeling misanthropical; the result was the combination of a stoned face and robotic half-skip, half-shuffling, that ultimately got us bursting out in laughter.

2) childlike, sprightly skipping; jie sheng gave an anxious caution about approaching strangers and stopped abruptly. result = happiness and more laughter.

3) sound of music-esque skipping while singing Do Re Mi; i was inspired by his exclamation that only Julie Andrews would skip around the way I did like no one's business. he joined in eventually hahahahaha. result = MORE laughter!

The conclusion: skipping is a happy sunshiney thing! later in the evening i recounted all these to wenhui my study buddy during our after-dinner walk, and recalled how, as a child, i found walking too slow and boring, so i skipped my way everywhere, so much so that my mum had to beg me to stop.

in the midst of philosophizing in the library i decided to draw a block of cheese for wenhui's mouse, because it couldn't stop squeaking in his laptop bag during our walk and i figured it was famished.

he says i'm a crazy girl, in a good crazy way. :D

Unreel

2007-04-02T17:08:38Z

Nights I've spent thinking,
how nice you are to me,
how nice if you weren't hers.

23rd jan: sushi don @ funan with the Backseat Girls + rebekah

2007-03-02T18:47:49Z

it was meant to be a surprise birthday celebration for rebekah, our mentor!

ali ven fel - they dug for gold as they turned desperate to get rich.

she ate, and ate... and ate. SO MUCH FOR GOING ON A DIET, salehaba!

while eating the birthday cake:
sa: hmmmmm, this cake is so nice! [reaches out for the remainder on the tray, slicing off a small piece and transfers it onto her plate]
me: AIYO SA. don't pretend please. just take the WHOLE THING.
sa: no la, i don't want, i don't want.
me: DON'T LIE. [dumps whatever remains on the tray onto her plate]
sa: [digs into the piece that i just dumped, speaks amidst mouthful after mouthful of cake] aiya i told you i don't want already!

we laughed and pelted her with YA RIGHTs. this girl ah.

and all night long fel took unglam pictures of me stuffing food into my mouth and doing some mean chewing

WE LOVE FRUITS. they give you great smiles (:

another successful birthday SURPRISE! woohoo.

sa me rebs jess. shot #1. then fel said, "okay! change pose."

shot #2. hahahhahahahahahhahahahhahhaa

mass demonstration of jess's heavy-headedness (she likes to tilt her head to one side and ask, "got miss me or nooooot?". and when she laughs, her head will land on the shoulder of the person beside her without fail.)

you know how they have such labels on the conveyor belt sushi plates and if you want the food you gotta order them? one of us exclaimed, "woo, i want the soft shell crab!", and jess almost immediately reached out for the plate. she realised her own mistake soon enough to not let it actually land on our table but a tad too late to prevent us from laughing at her (as usual). hahahhaha ever my blurest and cutest baby. she is the source of our many jokes, but we love her nonetheless.

the first sa-and-me-only shot, if i'm not wrong. we also only recently added each other on msn!

fel and i are so glad that the group's still tight, despite our initial predictions. as barney would sing, we are happy family :D

19th feb: Shodown @ MOS

2007-02-28T18:12:41Z

jessie baby was having a mahjong lesson and momo had to study for medicine so i tagged along with zhijian and his friends and his friends' friends. and among them was daphne, who happens to be alison's schoolmate in perth. she's funky and pretty yet motherly too! haha it's absolutely adorable, how she was nagging at the rest of us to study well while we were on the dancefloor (YES she did). and she has all these little cute groovy moves ooooh i'm so in love with her.

met talib and his friends. sam (extreme right) is some ambassador of whosgoing.sg

xuena's collage i love how the colourful lights tinted us differently!

talib and i remet on the dancefloor and he took a shot with his phone that he thought he took sneakily but I KNEW.
so here we are: an (momentarily) angry daph, a blurred me, and a blur zhijian.

Greg Pattillo leaves me feeling breathless.

2007-02-21T14:37:31Z

http://youtube.com/watch?v=59ZX5qdIEB0

this man must have big big lungs for that big big talent!

egredi @ 2007-02-21T01:55:00

2007-02-20T18:10:22Z

fysh and i talked on the phone earlier on and we marvelled at how long we've actually known each other. SIX YEARS! i swear it doesn't feel like it at all. so if you want a survivor friendship that stays fresh while lasting forever, you gotta follow our template:

talk
chill out
do trixxy stuff together
MIA
talk
MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA
MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA
MIA MIA MIA MIA
MIAMIA MIA MIA MIAMIAMIA MIA MIA
talk
MIA MIA
MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIAMIA MIA
MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA talk MIA MIAMIA MIA
MIA chill out MIA MIA MIA
MIAMIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA
MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA
MIA MIA MIA MIA
MIA MIA MIA MIA talk MIA
MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA kekeke MIA MIA
MIA MIA talk MIA hurhur MIA
talk
MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA MIA
MIA MIA
MIA
MIA MIA MIA MIA
chill out.

and in no time we figured we'll be in some nursing home together with creaky bones and wrinkly skin trixxing other old folks :D

Angels cry when stars collide.

2007-02-10T17:29:26Z

There were times I caught myself wishing I could trust and love you, boy. It would make things so much easier for us. You make me feel I'm some convenient - even so, beautiful, i hope - distraction you can use at your fancy, and I hate you for that. Though I can't help but feel you may perhaps feel the same way about me, but you made the first fucking cut even if you are all that oblivious to it, and that always serves as a good justification for any subtle attempts I suspect I've made to get back at you. I finally told someone about my deepest thoughts about you, and he says you're not a keeper (now that's some wordplay there).

Right where we are now, I am definite I wouldn't want it any other way.

this reminds me of stephen king's IT.

2007-02-08T15:13:25Z

so i was doing my research on ads and this is what i found.

IF THIS IS NOT DISTURBING I DON'T KNOW WHAT IS, OKAY.

egredi @ 2007-02-06T21:21:00

2007-02-06T14:29:55Z

had one of the usual Tuesday lunches at engine canteen with willy and his friend kevin and other random friends. friendship - thanks matt! - buys you shorter queuing time at the renowned indon food stall and boy, the grilled chicken rice is really quite hmmmmmm sedap. after lunch kevin unwittingly revealed that willy is attached (and has been since christmas - or earlier) and i went hysterical over his not telling me. so I gasped and laughed simultaneously till i got flushed, while willy smiled and blushed and hushed (me) cos i was making so much noise in the library hahah and kev just watched on helplessly. "cos you didn't ask, if you ask i surely tell you one" remained willy's defense statement throughout. so anyway i got to know everything and he showed me pictures which were hidden in the tutorials folder in the math module folder in the NUS stuffs folder in the My Documents folder. hahahah. i'm so happy for him, i couldn't stop telling him that while giving him pats on the back. okay i admit i obtained this picture without permision (rather than using the blatant 5-letter S word) but it's just so damn sweet and i couldn't help it. :D

kev has this straight stony pragmatic engineer's sense of humour, and we had a couple of rather funny dialogues that went as such:

#1
(we were having a discussion about a couple of very made-up girls a few tables away from us in the canteen. we generally disapprove of girls who cake their faces with make-up. I do, very. I mean, look girls, we've got youth, we don't need make-up. and by the way good make-up is moderately applied and very much invisible ie. you should still look sweet and natural even with all that petroleum you smear on your face.)

after a short silence after our discussion...
kev: hmmm.. why do girls who put make-up always stick together ah? i think they use their make-up to make friends. (mimics bimbotic female voice) oh hi!! you put make-up? ooh, me too! let's be friends.

#2
kev (talking to willy): hmm ya, I'm having my MNO (a business management module) lesson mah.
me: oh you take MNO too? i can't wait to s/u (an option you make for a module so that the final grade appears only as satisfactory/unsatisfactory and will not be taken into consideration in your final average) it.
kev: why! it's quite okay what. quite easy to manage and score.
me: ya it is. but i just don't like it. there's nothing quite wrong with it, but i just.. (with the aid of gestures) don't love it you know.
kev (slightly astounded): woah. are all arts students really like that? they make decisions with their (dramatically) feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelings.

and we don't care about our own faults

2007-02-03T18:37:15Z

during one of our crazy group discussions on friday wah chuan and donny exclaimed about my minimalistic 16x5x1.5cm pencil case. having justified his stance by violently shaking it and proving that the clanks produced were barely strident enough, wc spoke incriminatingly of my not offering the very minimal contents adequate space to breathe. i insist on the idea of cosiness instead of suffocation.

andrew just sent me this song and if you're an indie freak too you HAVE TO check it out. music vid available (but what's not) on youtube! always heartwarming to know that others think of sharing good music with me (:

He says it's sunny and white and cold all at once over there; I wish i could wake up to such a wonder too.